Målningarna – the paintings

In the forest
In the forest 2003

Aquarelle 101×63
19000 kr

The feeling of space in the forest is mightier than the seeming reality of it.

***

The interface
The interface 2003

Acrylic 102×72
23000 kr

Forest Outside Time

Down in a grey valley
Grew up in a haunted house.

They all looked human,
without what’s real in those.
Their language humiliation,
their relating abasement.

Didn’t understand them.
Hiding heart behind armour
Trying to be like a ghost.
Haunted by a memory of life.

Searching for love lost.
Waited for this moment.

 

The Interface

The sky above us
Earth under our feet

The illusions of separation
Mind captivating love

Nothing else
Stands in between

***

The woman, the ocean, the scene
The woman, the ocean and the scene 2010

Acrylic 62×75
9000 kr

When personal life makes no sense, a haphazard assortment of pieces from some jigsaw puzzle.
Why, we haven’t met for years, doesn’t she have time for me. Using my days thinking: ”Was I rejected? Should I try to put the pieces together, understand.” Analytical mind, sharp senses. Ready for duty!

Lazy silence. A smile is spreading.

***

Birth of Pegasus
Birth of Pegasus 2010

Aqrylic 80×58
(privat ago/privately owned)

Awakening by longing. Some truths are more devastatingly healing than others. Realizing that the mother didn’t see the person that was I, makes it possible to allow the longing for her love.
And the heart rejoices, while the feet are dancing.

***

Looking out
Looking out 2012

Acrylic 102×75
10000 kr

Having the blue tent, the wolf and the palm tree. Never will she get lost in a forest, in any forest. Sometimes the path just seemed to be longer.

***

Always there
Always there 2012

Acrylic 100×80 utan ram/not framed
15000 kr

The illusion has it that there was a whirlpool of personal happenings. So the mind imagined that there will be a warm and light existence, will be. By allowing a crucifixion this was made obvious to her.

***

Inanna
Inanna 2013

Acrylic 75×94
27000 kr

Trying outfit after outfit just to realize the as if of it all. Fear and courage mingled and mixed. Only the longing of the heart – truth I am thirsty- made her leave one mask after another. Starting to know what she was not. So now is here.

***

Into strength
Into strength 2013

Acrylic 95×75
12000 kr

But you are

Looking for you
Thinking of you
I don’t know

Squinting unfocused
What wants to happen
Slowly takes form

You are not in there
You are not out there
My beloved

What is

***

One heart
One heart 2013

Acrylic 151×62
32000 kr

One Heart

Planned, how futile to separate the parts.
Two flavours with a common centre

But pain of separation! The canvases, say why?
Try, see the heart of one.

Lady Ka-Ka, planet spotting.
Anchored in the heart
Observing humanity
One heart, huh? Need a brake from the soft sister. You make me dizzy.

A living spaceship is approaching, but I am at home already.

***

Silent witnessing
Silent witnessing 2013

Acrylic 75×94
17000 kr

In the night dream. Meeting a loving teacher in a beautiful house, but the organization was falling apart. A meeting was held with mature, knowledgeable teachers. Kristina as the lowest of the low. Some attack, and one man was killed. Fear, but Kristina offered to lead the group, without having any idea how.

Sliding into the daydream and once more offered the human life for what was right. And now, no one ”above” her. The responsibility is hers. Amazing.

Now and now

Round and heavy sadness,
unmistakably here.

Regaining human life
missing, wanted, found!
Longing is the real gem.
Dancing of desire.

Round and heavy sadness,
nothing for the mind.

 

***

Triangulation
Triangulation 2013

Acrylic 83×102
17000 kr

Many ages, many experiences, many unresolved traces within. You are all welcome to this guest house! Supported by clarity and presence, and so grateful. If non-locality – so you are here in our heart. Facing me, in you, in us.

***

Queen of Roses?
Queen of roses? 2013

Acrylic 75×94
29000 kr

A misunderstanding of this human life is revealed. She inhabited a container, almost dry. As a survival strategy she tried to control what was coming in and let out. From a longing she let the possibilities of love and relating in, while holding on to the emotional umbilical cord. She repeatedly fell on rock bottom. Slowly realizing that she was searching for love in all the wrong places.
Gradual connection with her true self made her courageous enough to one day give it all up with a cry: ”Awake, I want to wake up! Give me all that it takes!” She was flooded with fear and then love, until the container was full and she was floating on love and happiness. On top ot it some oily spots started to appear. Sadness and longing for intimacy. Ok spots, I see you and hold you here in the container.

Under the influence of the traveling cloud

A line of mothers
Gave what they were
Their infant babies
Were and became it

The young German maid
Pregnant with the boss
Scandalized and abandoned
Gave the baby away

The young woman and her man
A baby to keep
Building a family
Dragging Him home

The daughter of the daughter
Of the unhappy maid
Of the unhappy woman
Up to a point, continued

The content of that cloud
Fear, anger and guilt
Longing and waiting
The time has come

 

***

Rite of Passage
Rite of Passage 2012

Acrylic 95×75
15000 kr

Took a few hours to clean the windows. Never before did I feel so happy to look out through the crystal view. As if there is nothing is in between the me and the whole world. Unusual reactions lining up. Welcome to this guesthouse.

 

Meditation melt down

The skull was gone.
Bit by bit, day by day.
Cave in the forehead.
Only the tip of the nose is left.
At the back of the neck
melting, melting.

Protected and adorned
Fluffy, soft white with golden streaks.
Expanding who knows where
Clear and silent presence
Breathtakingly peaceful

Here I am.

***

IMG_3722
Floating together 2014

Acrylic
(privat ägo/privately owned)

I knew I would learn about love from you, but not that it would hurt so much.

It wasn’t really a baby boy

Looking up from the Kindle
To greet the little human
Beautiful toys, sweet face

Sparkling eyes looking back
We had to do it
Over and over again

Laughing hilariously silent
Look at me in a baby’s body
In a pram full of toys!

And look at me, a grown woman
Reading about practice
Coming from work!

Giggly integrity and curiosity
The air intensely clean
Meeting as knowledgeable souls

So silent time stopped
The moment when messages get through
No thoughts and no feelings.

So lovely the compassionate tenderness.
The softness of souls meeting
No thought and no feelings.

 

***

Recognition 2014 IMG_3794
Recognition 2014

Acrylic 65×81 utan ram/not framed
17000 kr

How simple, yet rocks my world! I am not a work in progress. Don’t have to fix this and that deficiency. I am complete already. And if I explore all those feelings of being incomplete without shame and the attempts at covering it up, I can relax into what I already am, in completeness.

What happened?

The breeze is warm.
The air is clear as crystal.
Smells come clearly.
Soft drops of rain
 moistening the cheeks.
Gratitude and wonder.

The pain of our heart
is held by soft strength
and willing presence.

***

We are one 2014
We are one 2014

Acrylic 100×80 Utan ram/not framed
19000 kr

Here I am

In a room full of people
In the midst of ego chatter
I am here, touched.

And then she took a shower in the waterfall

***

 IMG_4728

goD as Dog 2015

 

IMG_4703

Venus’ awakening 2016